I’ve been out and about doing the school tour and the live events to promote my book. All authors need to do that sort of thing in order to sell books and connect with an audience. So I’ve been doing a gig which is autobiographical called Don’t Do Drugs, Read Kirkland Ciccone Instead. Not that I tell people that’s the name of my gig, but that is what it’s called. Alternatively, it’s called Conjuring The Infinite Book Tour – which sounds nicer and easier to remember.
Let’s take a look back at some notable live events of the last few months:
Irritable Vowel Syndrome – 11th Saturday 2013
My book launch at Cumbernauld Theatre. What a night!
The Waterstones Dash – 22nd June 2013
As part of an initial promo blitz, I went to ELEVEN different branches of Waterstones across Scotland. It was quite a day. Afterwards, I went for a nice salad in M&S. “Well this certainly beats Iceland,” I told my publisher.
The school tour I was meant to go on was postponed to allow for the holidays. However, I was still busy.
Young Adult – August 8th 2013
Cumbernauld Museum. I had my nice new projector and a screen. Toting them together, I unleashed a little gig about YA books. I know a lot about these books. I write them.
Cheap As Chips – Tidelines Book Festival – 5th September 2013
My very first book festival! It was great. My mum took me to Ayrshire when I was little, but lied to me and said it was Spain. We’ve never trusted each other since that day. Chris Brookmyre was on the night before me and Des Dillon did his set the night afterwards. That’s good, isn’t it? I turned up and gave out chips to everyone. I’m promoting obesity and literacy in one fell swoop. I enjoyed it so much that I’m going back next year.
Coltness High School – 13th September 2013
My first school visit and it was a great day. Thank goodness for that! Miss Leckie, the librarian, got some cakes and we had tea and a laugh. Her library is flawless. I’m serious. Coltness has recently been revamped, so it’s quite glossy now. I didn’t read from my book, because I didn’t realise that is what authors had to do! I’m very naive about these things, but I’m getting there slowly but surely. Despite that, I sold a stack of books and gained a gang of new Twitter followers. That’s how you judge success, of course. It’s a great school.
Looking Glass Books – 19th September 2013
Loved it! The coolest book shop in Edinburgh.
Bo’Ness Academy – 27th September 2013
Another fun day and they had a cake sale!
I eat lots of cake.
I’m a grubber.
How I Became Kirkland Ciccone – 8th October 2013
Airdrie Library as part of SMHAFF, which means Scottish Mental Health Arts and Film Festival. My hair was a mess and my shirt was especially loud. However, I did a fab gig and sold books. Basically I talked about growing up in the ugliest town in the country – yes, Cumbernauld! I love Cumbernauld though. It has real character.
Caldervale High School – 28th October 2013
AKA Cathy Macphail and Kirkland Ciccone Against The World. I finally got to meet an idol of mine, the fabulous Cathy Macphail. The audience – third year English – were brilliant. There was also a Doctor Who fan in the audience, which is always a good thing. I signed books afterwards and answered questions. Then I had lunch with the book club. That was great fun too. Lesley (the librarian) gave us a selection of fruit and lovely fruit juice.
I eat the crisps. I need to eat more fruit, I know.
Kids’ Lit Quiz – 11th November 2013
A huge event. I’m crap at pub quizzes, so when my publisher arranged for me to attend this literary convention, I laughed – but I said yes, because it’s a good way to meet your audience. I got the Roald Dahl questions right, of course. “One hundred points for every team,” I announced, much to the horror of the judges. I met with fellow authors Victoria Campbell (I bought Viking Gold from Waterstones a while ago and enjoyed it very much), Keith Charters (he’s a good friend) and…Cathy Macphail! She watches Bates Motel religiously.
Clyde Valley High – 16th November 2013
AMAZING! I was booked to do a gig for the third year English class. They were probably horrified until they got there and experienced the full amazingness of my one man show. So I went through my slides, talked about Conjuring The Infinite, signed a stack of autographs and posed for photographs. It was a good laugh and they actually learned quite a bit without realising it. I should have been a teacher. Anyway, I went down to the canteen for lunch and relived my youth. I had curry. It was great. Cumbernauld High School had such a crappy canteen back in my day. So I’m probably going to return to Clyde Valley High at some point in the future for a Catalyst Book Award event. They have loads of trophies in their trophy cabinet and their library is immaculate.
Now I’m taking a nice little rest before my next two gigs which take place at the end of this week. Our Ladies High School and Saint Maurice’s High School. Then I’m booked for an event for Scottish Book Week. More about that in the next few days.
Yes, this jumper is very KIRKLAND CICCONE CHRISTMAS SWAG!!!